Sunday, August 16, 2015

Allow me to complain about EDS

This will ONLY be about my bitching and nagging about EDS, so you can just scroll on if you don't wanna read this. And that's ok. I just need to went a bit.

I felt it last night, that my muscles were cramping a wee bit... just a little. But enough for me to notice, so I knew that I'd wake up in excruciating painful cramps. And I was right. 1-0 to Jo.

I went to bed at 10 last night cause I was SO tired, fell asleep almost immediately even though I could feel the cramps come crawling slowly... and of course I woke up at 2am cramping and twitching like crazy. It was a living hell... I can't rest for more than 4 hours, no matter how tired I am. I can't lay down for more than that. I hate it. I HATE IT SO BAD.

I hate the fact that I have EDS. I hate that I have to go through this. And I hate how no one could possibly understand what these cramps feels like... Today my abs are sore just cause they were cramping so hard. I could barely get out of bed.

Frost laid next to me all night, trying to pat my tummy and make me relax. Telling me to calm down and breathe slowly.
Yet nothing makes me relax.
Nothing makes my muscles slow down and chill when I'm in that state.

Not even the O's, nor the saroten (which is Greek for bullshit) helps.
I need the o's during the daytime to function st A's place. (I've noticed that they work better than the others) And I honestly do need it that way despite what the doctors think. I don't give a fuck. I rarely eat painkillers these days anyway. It might be the reason for why I'm relapsing like this....

But I want the big O's. They help me out way more than any other pills.
And I only need them certain days. Like today's would be a good day.
I have some, but I don't want to use them today. Yeah I know, it's complicated. Kind of a long story...........

But the doctors need to find me something for the nighttime that'll allow me to sleep normally, something that makes me wake up without cramps. O's definitely don't work for the night. Nope.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaah......... it's ok. I feel better just having a rant. I needed to went I guess.
Can't complain ALL the fucking time in front of Frost and the rest of my family.


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